Feline Funnies

Flipping Out!

Earlier this year, I purchased an automated feeding machine for my cats. [I described this event in an earlier post titled "Attack of the Feeding Machine"]. Gracie's inability to cope with Daylight Saving Time changes prompted the purchase. Gracie didn't care that her previous breakfast time of 5:30 am was now actually 4:30 am. Consistency was crucial to her state of mind. I just needed to adjust.

 

 
 

 The automated feeding machines were my solution to this dilemma. I put a teensy portion of Benjamin and Gracie's breakfast serving in tray #1 which opened at about 4:30 am - the old breakfast time. I put the rest of their breakfast in the second tray and set the timer on it to open at 5:30 am - the new breakfast time. It took a little getting used to, but they eventually adjusted to this new arrangement. Disaster diverted - life returned back to its normal state of chaos. At least, it did for awhile.

 

Benjamin Bunny is very mechanically inclined. He loves to figure out how things open, close, turn on, turn off etc... He is still trying to figure out the printer situation from last week. Yesterday, He got stuck between the back of the printer and the wall while trying to see if that's how the paper gets into the machine.

 

Each evening he stops whatever he is doing to watch me open the two compartments in each feeding maching, fill each with the appropriate amount of food, close the lids, and set the four timers (each machine has two timers - one per compartment). You can almost see the wheels turning in his little brain while he observes my movements. I really should have anticipated the events that were getting ready to unfold.

 

Lately, Benjamin and Gracie have started playing a vigorous game of hide and seek each morning after eating their "1st breakfast" at 4:30 am. So by about 5:30 am, Benjamin wants to eat his "2nd big breakfast". And, he wants to eat it THEN. Waiting one second longer is not an option.

 

Unfortunately for Benjamin Bunny, the timers on the automated feeding machines are not the most accurate devices ever made. You have to sort of approximate the time you want each compartment to open and hope for the best. Apparently my best is not good enough for a hungry Bunny. 

 

You see,  I recently found his automated feeding machine flipped upside down beside his water dish, the top of the compartment holding first breakfast completely removed from its hinges. It seems that Bunny, frustrated with it for not opening on time, decided to try and open the 2nd breakfast compartment himself. Alas, he was not very successful.

 

The first time this happened I figured it was the result of rowdy behavior by either Gracie or Bunny or both of them. By the fifth time, I decided it was time to investigate.

 

Since whatever was going on always happened between 1st and 2nd breakfast, a stakeout of some sort was going to be necessary. I decided to get up between 1st and 2nd breakfast and camp out on the couch. The couch is located in the family room which connects to the kitchen. I would be able to sneak a peek at the cats the moment I heard any noise.

 

A few minutes after 5:30 am, I began to hear a bumping noise coming from the area where Benjamin's automated feeding machine sits every night. I peeked over the kitchen counter and saw him head butting the machine. He was bending down low enough to get his nose under the edge of the compartment top sealing in his 2nd breakfast. Once in position, he tried to force it open with an upward swing of his head. The goal was for his nose to connect with the outer edge of the compartment top and force it open.

 

Each time this method failed, he became a little more aggressive with his upward head swings. As in the past, this caused him to accidentally flip the machine upside down and send it crashing into his water bowl. Water splashed everywhere. 

 

And it didn't end there. Still determined to get to his 2nd breakfast, Benjamin Bunny proceeded to push the upside down machine into the kitchen leaving a trail of water behind it.

 

I knew I had to intervene at that point. There was no way Bunny was going to get his 2nd breakfast now unless he flipped the machine back over. The top was being held shut by the weight of the upside down machine. And all Bunny seemed intent on doing at this point was sliding it around the kitchen, richocheting from one kitchen cabinet bottom to another.

 

Hurdling the streaks of water making my kitchen floor resemble a slip 'n slide, I retrieved the feeding machine and popped the top open so Bunny could eat his 2nd breakfast at last. The poor thing was so pooped from his attempts to open it that he collapsed in a heap on the rug the moment he finished eating and fell sound asleep.

 

Until I can locate an automated feeding machine with a more accurate timer, I am seriously considering getting my old lesson plans on simple machines out of the garage and teaching Bunny about levers, ramps, etc... Despite his failure to open the feeding machine, he showed great ingenuity in his attempts. He may yet achieve his dream of becoming the first feline construction engineer - unless he makes it as an outfielder for the Boston Red Sox. But, that is a post for another day.

 

Until next time, remember...

If I had to select one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being most highly correlated with success, whatever the field, I would pick the trait of persistence. Determination. The will to endure to the end, to get knocked down seventy times and get up off the floor saying. “Here comes number seventy-one!

 ~ Richard M. Devos

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Attack of the Feeding Machine

 

It's always the things you assume are going to be a breeze to do that turn into traumatic events. Or so it seems in my household, especially where my feline friends are concerned. The introduction of new automated pet feeding machines this past week was no exception.

 

As I described in a previous post (Someone PLEASE Explain Daylight Saving Time To My Cats ), Gracie does NOT adjust well to changes in her meal schedule or diet. Unfortunately, both had to be altered this fall due to daylight savings time and Benjamin Bunny's new diet plan. To say that Gracie has not adapted well is to put things mildly.

 

While some progress was made in November, there were setbacks in December. The daytime racket caused by the ongoing renovation of my home seems to have induced a relapse of sorts. Maybe she senses how exhausted the chaos is making me. Maybe that is why Gracie is once again afraid that I will oversleep and forget to feed her. I don't know. But whatever the reason, a new solution is needed. That is where the new automated pet feeding machines come in to play.

 

I found them at a pet store the Friday before Christmas and thought I had won the lottery. Both feeding machines have two trays, each with its own timer. First breakfast could go in one, and second breakfast could go in the other. (This feeding ritual is explained in Someone PLEASE Explain Daylight Saving Time To My Cats.) Once Gracie and Bunny learned how the feeding machines worked, my sleepless nights would be history.

 

New Year's Eve seemed like the perfect night to introduce Gracie and Bunny to these new meal dispensers. Starting the New Year off fully refreshed was the motivation behind this decision. Looking back, I must have been especially sleep deprived when I made it.

 

Using a few of their favorite treats to familiarize them with how the feeding machines worked seemed like a good way to start. My husband helped me figure out how to put treats in each tray and set the timers for a few minutes later. It never occurred to me that Gracie would be leaning over a closed tray when it popped open.

 

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. The timer stopped, the latch clicked, and the tray cover popped open bumping Gracie ever so slightly across the chin. But that was enough to send her hopping sideways away from the tray with her fur sticking out in all directions.  It was like something out of a movie. I had never actually seen a cat hop sideways on the tips of her paws while arching her back up and hissing.

 

Bunny, unsure of what had just happened, couldn't decide whether or not to eat the treat waiting in the open tray of his feeding machine. Since he had not seen the actual "pop top attack", Bunny didn't know whether it was the treat Gracie was upset with or the feeding machine. Lucky for us, he couldn't resist eating the treat. At least one cat was willing to use the new automated pet feeders.

 

Gracie, in the meantime, was “tippy-pawing” around the room, occasionally going in circles. I tried in vain to calm her down, but she was now mad at me for bringing the vicious food dispensers into her  ouse. Completely deflated, I plopped on the ground convinced I might never sleep through the night again.

 

Anger overtook fear at this point, and Gracie became determined to show the feeding appliance how she felt about it. Still on “tippy- paws”, she begins circling it - occasionally reaching out to punch it with her right front paw. When it did not punch back, she moved in closer. This behavior continued until the smell of the treats began to wear her down.

 

After seeing Bunny eat treats from the second tray attached to his feeding machine, Gracie finally decided to take a chance and nibble on one of the treats still lying in her tray. For a moment, it looked like things might work out alright. That was when I heard the latch on Gracie's second tray click.

 

I dove for the cover from my nearby position on the floor. Gracie's body went rigid as she leaped straight up and away from the tray. Although I wasn't able to stop the cover from popping open, it didn't hit her this time.

 

That was not good enough, however, to lesson her anxiety. It was like watching instant replay as she began alternating  etween arched back side-hopping and spinning in circles. It was beginning to look like both my cat and I were going to need therapy before the night was over.

 

The only one who seemed unaffected by Gracie's battle with the feeding appliance was Bunny. He had finished both sets of treats in his trays. And now he was secretly inching his way over to Gracie's tray to eat hers since it seemed she wasn't going to.

 

I think that it might have been the possibility of losing her food to Bunny that snapped Gracie out of her tizzy fit. Once she realized what Bunny was up to, she began making her way tentatively back to her feeding machine.

 

My husband and I were afraid to breathe for fear of alarming Gracie as she punched and hissed at both feeding trays. Too tired to fight anymore, she finally calmed down enough to eat a treat from one of the trays. When it didn't attack back this time, she gobbled up all the treats from both trays as fast as she could. I felt sure that she would decide to pee on the feeding machine when she was done just to show it who was boss. Thankfully, she didn't.

 

No, we didn't pack up the feeding machines and put them away after this - although initially I did feel the urge to crush the one that caused the trauma. Since Bunny was alright with using them, I wanted to keep working with Gracie.

 

I am happy to report that progress is being made. Gracie seems to know when her feeding machine will open for 1st breakfast now and waits until a few minutes before that time to wake me. As long as I accompany her downstairs and make sure the top has popped open already, she will let me return to bed while she eats.

 

 

Until next time, remember...

 

Good intentions are like a wheelbarrow - because if you get anywhere with them you have to do the pushing yourself.

-Ernest C. Wareing

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Someone PLEASE Explain Daylight Saving Time To My Feline Friends

 

On November 4th at 2:00 a.m., Daylight Saving Time took effect, and millions of people turned their clocks back one glorious hour. Each individual breathed a heavy sigh knowing that he or she would be able to sleep in an extra hour that morning without feeling the slightest bit guilty.

 

I, too, was one of those happy people...at least for a little while. For some unknown reason, I assumed my cats would simply adjust to the change in their morning mealtime without complaint. I mean they were getting an extra hour to roam the house free of human interference - an extra hour to undecorate shelves, trample through clean laundry, and hide small objects that didn't belong to them. I thought it was a win-win situation for everyone, human and feline alike. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG AGAIN!!!

 

Apparently, an extra hour of playtime is not worth disrupting a previously set schedule. If breakfast is supposed to occur at 5:00 a.m., Gracie and Benjamin Bunny expect me to be up and on the way to the kitchen by 4:55 a.m. Too bad if Daylight Saving Time makes 4:55 a.m. now 3:55 a.m. That is a human problem not a feline one. Consequently, I must find a way to deal with it - not them.

 

Ever since November 4th, I have been getting a 3:30 a.m. wake-up call from Gracie in the form of either a head butt or rapid drum beat on the cables connecting the bedroom TV to the cable box. She gravitates from one to the other until I get up. No matter how many times I try to explain the benefits of gaining an extra hour of sleep (or playtime in her case), she refuses to change her routine. Gracie's internal alarm clock says it is time for me to prepare her breakfast, so that is what I must do.

 

I have tried several counter measures since that fateful day, each designed to gently help Gracie alter her schedule. But, all have failed. The most recent being to remove Gracie (and Benjamin) to another part of the house filled with lots of toys, get both to start playing with them, and then escape to my bedroom while they are otherwise occupied. Alas within minutes of my returning to the bedroom, I hear the first round of banging and paw scraping on the closed door accompanied by a chorus of pitiful mews.

 

Now, don't get me wrong. I love my feline friends as much as I love my human family members. But at my age, sleep is a luxury I can't afford to do without. That is why I have had to resort to a "Hobbit- style" meal arrangement in order to accommodate my two beloved feline friends.

 

It begins with 1st breakfast (a small sampling of real breakfast) which is served at 4:00 a.m. (formerly 5:00 a.m.). This small sampling of food seems to satisfy them, temporarily allowing me to sneak back to bed until at least 5:15 (or 5:30 on a really good day). It is amazing how wonderful those extra 75 minutes of sleep can be.

 

2nd breakfast (or Real breakfast) is then served at either 5:15 or 5:30 a.m. This is when Gracie and Ben receive the remaining portion of their actual morning meal. So far, this "Hobbit-style" meal arrangement seems to be working. My feline friends are satisfied, and I am able to get a reasonable amount of sleep, even if it is in small increments.

 

But if there is one thing I have learned over the last several years, it is that my feline friends (just like my human children) can change their minds overnight about what is acceptable. This is why I am desperately searching for some way to help them understand the concept of Daylight Saving Time. I fear my sleep-deprived sanity may need it in the near future.

 

So my fellow cat caregivers, here is a chance to share your success stories. I welcome any suggestions that might help me solve my Daylight Saving Time breakfast dilemma. The mindboggling prospect of serving both 1st and 2nd breakfast from now until Sunday, March 10, 2013 forces me to consider almost any reasonable suggestion.

 

Until next time, bon appetit and remember...

 

Never try to outstubborn a cat.

- Robert A. Heinlein

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dieting Dilemmas

 

In a previous post, I described Benjamin Bunny’s latest visit to the veterinarian (i.e. the one in which he transformed into a turtle halfway through the visit).  The small detail I refrained from sharing was the depressing news that he was being put on a diet due to a slight (major understatement) weight gain since his last comprehensive checkup. 

 

I felt devastated when I heard the news.  In my mind, I had failed my cat.   My emotional response was so strong that I actually brought tears to my vet’s eyes.  When I left her office, I got the feeling that she was actually more worried about my ability to deal with Bunny’s new dietary restrictions rather than his.

 

Once I returned home and released my “cat/turtle” from his “carrier/shell”, I created a list of all the new supplies needed to successfully meet Bunny’s dietary needs.  Then, it was off to the store with a somber heart and heavy sigh.

 

I t didn’t take long for me to acquire all of the recommended products and return home.  So, I began to feel confident that maybe things weren’t going to be as bad as I had imagined.  I’m not sure why such thoughts do not set warning sirens off in my brain after all these years.   Especially, since I keep the following quote on a bulletin board in my office at home.

 

Confidence is the feeling you have BEFORE you truly understand the situation.

 

Needless to say, I unpacked my grocery bag blissfully unaware of how my anal retentiveness was going to impact the events to come. 

 

According to my vet, I was to provide dry food for Bunny and Gracie in the mornings and 3 ounces of wet food per cat in the evenings.  No more leaving dry food out all day and all night.  Alright, how hard could that be?

 

For an anal retentive person like me, it turns out it can be VERY difficult.   For starters, my grocery store does not sell 3 ounce cans of my cats’ wet food.  It only sells 5.5 ounce cans.  When did that happen, and why couldn’t they just squish .5 back into a can so it could be split evenly in half?  Some of us like to be precise in our measurements. 

 

To make matters worse, I was supposed to follow the portion  allotments on the dry food bag exactly as stated in order to make sure each cat, especially Bunny, received the correct amount of food – Gracie to maintain her current weight and Bunny to lose weight.  ACKKKKKKK!  Nowhere on the bag did it say what to do if you are also feeding them wet food.  My anal retentive brain began to shows signs of an impending mental  meltdown. 

 

With the help of my handy-dandy calculator and a quick call to my vet (which seemed to leave her dazed and slightly concerned about my mental state), I was able to determine as accurately as possible the correct portion size of food for each cat.  I was ready to begin with gusto tomorrow  morning.  Little did I know that this was going to be my last good night’s sleep for several days...weeks...

 

As usual, Gracie alerted me the next morning that it was time for breakfast with the usual series of head butts, etc…  Mentally unprepared for what lay ahead, I stumbled down the stairs and into the kitchen.  Both cats waited expectantly for the usual portion of wet food to be accompanied with a day’s supply of dry food.  Unconcerned, I carefully measured out the new dry food and presented it to them with a smile.

 

Bunny, although hesitant at first, began to chow down vigorously.  Gracie …. she just stared at me with a look that said,

“That’s it?!  Are you kidding me!  Where is my wet food?  Do you expect me to start my day off without it?  How about you start your day off without coffee and see how that works out for you?!!”

 

Bunny finished his dry food without a problem and went off to lie on the windowsill and catch some rays.  And yes, Gracie finally decided to eat her dry food after I put it back in her bowl…several times.  For the next several hours, I went about my daily routine thinking the worst was over.

 

About one o’clock in the afternoon, Bunny began following me around and emitting a whiny “meooooow”.  I checked to make sure he was okay, played with him for awhile, and then resumed what I had been doing.   Pretty soon he was back at it again. 

 

I decided to go downstairs and make sure he hadn’t dropped his favorite toys in the water bowls again.  Bunny followed me and began circling the spot where the dry food bowl used to be.  When I didn’t respond to his plea for food, he proceeded to flop down on the ground like he was dying of starvation.  And, I had thought Gracie was the only drama queen in the family.

 

This type of behavior continued throughout the afternoon everywhere I went in the house.  At one point, Bunny even rolled onto his back and put  is feet up in the air like a possum playing dead.  About 4:30, Gracie decided to join in using her “intimidator” stare.  She would sit a few feet away and stare at me like I would make a good snack while Bunny flopped away nearby. 

 

At 4:55, I took the wet food out of the cabinet.  Both cats went into nuzzle overdrive.  Before this, Bunny had never really seemed interested in wet food.  But now, he almost knocked Gracie over to get to his bowl when I placed them in the holders.  Finally, I could relax…at least for a little while.

 

Exhausted from flopping and staring, both cats went to their respective resting spots and enjoyed food-induced sleep comas for several hours.   Their hunger pains returned at approximately 3:30 the next morning when I awoke to head butts and LOUD meows from both of them. 

 

In an attempt to avoid waking everyone else in the house up, I crept downstairs - cats in tow – with the intention of sleeping on the couch in the family room until the 5 a.m. feeding time.  I now understand what both a punching bag and trampoline feel like.  For the next hour and a half, both felines used both physical and verbal means to deprive me of sleep and alert me to their impending starvation.  I don’t know how I held them off  until 5, but I did.

 

By 5:01, I was opening up the dry food bag and attempting to scoop out each cat’s daily portion despite the fact that Bunny was trying to climb in the bag at the same time.  This time Gracie didn’t pout but dove right in and ate.  Bunny couldn’t chew fast enough.  I was too tired to crawl back to
the couch, so I just “flopped” down on the kitchen floor next to them knowing someone would find me eventually.

 

I am happy to announce that although the next several days mimicked the one described above, things have greatly improved.  I am now allowed to  sleep until 4:45 before the starvation alert begins.  And, the addition of a few dental treats in mid-afternoon seems to help Bunny make it to dinner without excessive flopping.  Finally, Bunny has begun to shed a little weight, and I am slowly starting to regain what sanity I had to begin with.

 

If you take nothing else from this story, I hope that you learn from my misguided devotion to my feline friends.  Follow the advice of your vet.  Do not “overfeed” your felines no matter how pitiful they act.  Remember, it is usually just an act.  A little redirected play will prove to you if they are actually hungry or just bored.  Think about it - don’t humans tend to nibble or munch when bored?  Why should cats be any different?

 

Until next time, remember…

 

An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.

- Irv Kupcinet