Feline Funnies

Waiting To Flush

 

It has recently come to my attention that each of my cats has a favorite room in the house.  Gracie’s, of course, is the kitchen because that is where the food lives.  Benjamin Bunny’s favorite room, on the other hand, is the bathroom.  Why you ask?  That is where the toilet lives.

 

I made this slightly disturbing discovery while I was tidying up after everyone else left for work.  Finally, several fairly puzzling clues fit together and explained Benjamin’s fascination with bathrooms.

 

Clue #1: 

Benjamin Bunny has always been intrigued with running water – whether it be a simple drip from a shower head or a gush from a faucet.  If he thinks I am going to wash dishes, Bunny will jump onto the counter, hop-run (his version of running) across it, and stop just above the sink.  Hanging his head over the edge, he will move as close to the faucet as he can get without getting wet.  Tail swishing excitedly, Bunny will stare with fascination at the water as it moves over dishes or down the drain.

 

Clue #2:                  

A light shining from under a closed bathroom door is like a Bunny magnet.  When we first moved into our new house, Benjamin Bunny discovered that several body slams against the downstairs half-bath door would cause it to open – regardless of whether or not it was occupied. 

 

By the time the door burst open and a curious cat scooted inside, the occupant usually had time to readjust his or her clothing.  But, the lid was often still up – which was the only thing Bunny was interested in.  Without acknowledging the occupant, he would jump onto the tank and lean precariously over the open toilet.  Immediately, the lid would be replaced in order to prevent further trauma to cat or human via a tumble into the toilet.  (The locking mechanism was eventually fixed before too many people were traumatized!)

 

Clue #3:

One of Benjamin Bunny’s favorite lounging spaces has become the shelf built into the wall above the master bathroom toilet.  I discovered this while I was searching for Tylenol one day.  The toilet area in the master bathroom is separated from the rest of the bathroom by a door which is typically left open if unoccupied. 

 

While reaching under the sink for the bottle of Tylenol, I noticed something frightening out of the corner of my eye – a head of hair several feet above the actual toilet.  Being the only one in the house, this freaked me out. 

 

So, I screamed – which in turn caused Benjamin Bunny (the mysterious head of hair) to LEAP straight off the shelf above the toilet where he had been sleeping, SLAM into the bathmat next to the walk-in shower, and SLIDE the rest of the way across the bathroom into me.  We NOW have an house alarm system which will hopefully prevent future cases of mistaken identity.

 

Clue #4:

Benjamin Bunny likes to sleep on the bathmat surrounding the master bathroom toilet.  This discovery was made one night when I awoke with an urgent case of bladder overload.  I stumbled half-blind (my glasses were stupidly still on my nightstand) into the toilet area without noticing Bunny laying on the bathmat.  I knew the moment my toes touched his tail that pain was soon to follow. 

 

He did a mid-air turn and landed with his back claws extended on my bare feet.  In my defense, he IS a black cat, and it was DARK.  Besides, who sleeps on a bathmat that is positioned next to a toilet – YUCK!!!!!

 

Clue #5:

Flushing a toilet creates a whirlpool that sucks Benjamin Bunny’s curiosity right in every time.  Unfortunately, the various human members of my family do not always remember to put the lid down on the toilets after using them – no matter how many times I nag.  When that happens, Bunny usually finds out first.  I will find him standing up on his back paws, pressing down on the seat with his front paws, and peering intently down at the water. 

 

It wasn’t until I accidentally pressed on the tank lever during one of these occasions that I discovered why he was there.  The moment the water started swirling down the drain his tail went into overdrive.  He was swishing it back and forth so fast I thought he would lose his balance and fall backward into the toilet paper roll.  When the toilet filled back up, he looked up at me so excitedly that I had to flush it for him again…… and again……and again.

 

So, Benjamin Bunny now stalks bathrooms.  Patiently, he waits for someone to flush a toilet and let him watch the water swirl away.   I think he now knows that more will then reappear to be flushed again another day.

                                           
                            
                        

                                      Look at it go!  Look at it go!

 

 

                            

                                         
                                           Flush again PLEEEEASE!

 

 Until next time, remember...

 

There is no more intrepid explorer than a kitten.

- Jules Champfleury

Pet Adoptions: Who Rescues Who?

 

Spring is typically associated with blooming flowers, baby chicks, and changing weather. Many people tend to gravitate towards family outings such as picnics, ballgames, and fishing. The world seems bright and exciting after winter’s chill.

 

But for some, spring is just another season to spend contemplating on how to cope with life’s latest challenge, either as a family or alone. The sounds of happy birds and children playing outside can sometimes reinforce loneliness or loss – both material and physical.

 

Sitting on my back porch looking out on my pond, I reflected on how I dealt with my own issues these past two years, especially during the spring. What had I done that had enabled me to handle each new dilemma? Why had I survived a situation that my coworkers said they couldn’t or wouldn’t even consider?

 

A thump on the door opening onto the back porch provided me with the answer. Staring at me were my two feline friends. They were the answer I had been searching for just now.

 

Each of my cats entered my life at a time when it seemed that I was being overwhelmed with challenges. Two years ago my husband took a job across the state. I agreed to stay behind so that my youngest daughter, Rae, could finish her junior and senior years in her current high school. I would continue to teach fourth grade just in case the job did not work out.

 

A few days before the new school year began, I was feeling blue. I decided I needed mall therapy and took my two daughters to the new outdoor mall in town. I was headed for Talbots, Rae to Claire's, and my oldest daughter, Leigh, to the new SPCA mall adoption center.

 

Unable to find anything of interest in Talbots, I meandered down to the SPCA mall adoption center. It was there that I found the cure for my feelings of sadness, loneliness, and fear.

 

The moment I entered the adoption center, Leigh grabbed my arm and dragged me over to a cage holding a small grey ball of fur. The SPCA volunteer handed the grey ball of fur to me, and my heart melted. I didn't put the little kitten named Gracie down until it was time to load her into a carrier for the car ride home. It was Gracie's companionship that helped me manage the loneliness I felt that year with my husband so far away and Leigh's impending college graduation just around the corner.

 

Benjamin Bunny entered my life in a similar fashion. My husband surprised me with a rare weekend visit about a year after Gracie became a member of the family. We were walking through the same outdoor mall, and I convinced him to let me stop in at the SPCA store so I could get Gracie a toy and make a donation to the SPCA.

 

Within minutes of entering, I spotted Ben. He was so adorable with his big ears, quizzical expression, and huge paws. As soon as I held him, I knew that he was the perfect addition to our growing feline family.

 

And, I was right. From the moment Benjamin Bunny entered our lives he brought laughter, love, and a sparkle to our family. Whenever I was down, Benjamin always managed to get me to giggle with his humorous antics.

 

Adopting or rescuing Gracie and Ben was the solution to surviving a difficult time in my life. Focusing on someone other than myself helped melt away my loneliness and fear. It provided me with a distraction from the daily dilemmas that were becoming overwhelming at times.

 

It is this realization that forces me to ask "who really rescued who"? I may have freed Gracie and Ben from a life within a cage, but they have given me companionship and laughter. Gracie and Ben helped me find a positive side to an otherwise challenging two years.

So if you are facing a stressful spring, consider adopting a cat or dog. Visit your local animal shelter, Humane Society, or SPCA adoption center. Let yourself be rescued too!!!

 

Until another thought blooms,

 

Animals are such agreeable friends – they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms.

– George Elliot

Just Because I Can DOESN'T Mean I Should

 

Everyone likes to believe that his or her pet is the smartest creature of its kind on the planet.  Until recently, I was supremely confident that I was the only person who was right.  THEN, Bunny encountered the cereal box, and my bubble of blissful superiority was burst.

 

From the moment of adoption, I have tried to use positive reinforcement to discourage my two feline friends from attempting feats that could lead to harm or intense embarrassment.  I was hoping to have better success with my cats than I did with my two children.  Alas, the odds have definitely been against me.

 

I never yell or handle my cats roughly when they do something I perceive to be “naughty” or dangerous.  I just gently move them or try to redirect their attention like my numerous manuals on raising cats tell me to do.   I reward positive choices with occasional nutritious treats and softly spoken praise.

 

But just like with my two daughters, this doesn’t always work.  All four of my “children”, both feline and human, seem to follow the philosophy – just because I can DOES mean I should.  The removal of N’T from does is what usually gets them into trouble.

 

Before Benjamin Bunny became part of our family, Gracie would occasionally get herself into a sticky situation as evidenced by the couch birthing post.  But, she seemed to learn quickly from her mistakes and rarely repeated them.  And once Ben came on the scene, she used his success or failure to determine whether or not to engage in similar types of behavior.  I guess you could say that Ben became her “test dummy”.

 

Although I could entertain you for quite a while relaying ALL of Benjamin Bunny’s various embarrassing exploits, I am going to focus this post on his recent inability to avoid the temptation of venturing into enclosed dark spaces – particularly those with only one way in or out.

 

Bunny has always loved boxes of any shape or size.  He loves to sit in them, lay on top of them, or just shove them around until I trip or fall because of them.  I personally do not understand the attraction, but they make him happy. 

 

So when an open, empty 12.8 oz. cereal box was accidentally left on the kitchen counter, Bunny was elated.  Carefully, he circled it moving from left to right as always – I think he is left pawed – occasionally nudging it lightly with his nose.  As a result of the nose nudging, the box moved dangerously close to the edge of the counter.  Bunny was too engrossed in his reconnaissance to notice. 

 

The sudden disappearance of the box accompanied by the resounding “BAM” caused him to do a great imitation of a furry helicopter lifting straight up, paws out horizontally, and claws extended.  A lopsided 360 degree turn in mid-air completed the scenario.  For once, the counter and not my body was the landing zone.

 

Looking extremely distraught and puzzled, Benjamin Bunny sadly surveyed the counter for any sign of his box.  It took a few minutes for the clues of missing box and a “BAM” sound to lead him to the conclusion that the box might now be on the floor.  After a quick check of the area beneath the counter to confirm his hypothesis, Bunny leaped joyfully down to the floor to continue his investigation of the box.

 

Now satisfied that the exterior of the box was safe, it was time for a thorough examination of the interior.  This would mean finding a way inside the box.   

 

By pushing on the sides of the box with his paw, Bunny was able to discover the weakened top flaps.  Using his head as a battering ram, he began trying to shove open the flaps.  Each time he hit the flaps, he moved the box closer and closer to the base of a cabinet. 

 

Finally with the back end of the box positioned firmly against the base of a cabinet, Bunny was able to head butt the top flaps back into the box.  Entrance into the dark interior was mere moments away. 

 

Taking a few steps back and lowering his head into battering ram position, Bunny lunged forward into the box.  SUCCESS at last!!!

 

Unfortunately, this is also when things began to take a slightly negative turn.  Yes, Bunny was in the box.  But, he was also now wearing the box.  And sadly, there was not a prize at the bottom of the box to make it worthwhile.

 

It was at this time that the lack of an exit strategy must have entered his mind.  The box was too narrow for him to push through and emerge from the bottom.  Besides, that end was still pushed up against the base of the cabinet.  In an attempt to move the box away from the cabinet, Bunny sat up on his two back paws and began smacking the box with his other two paws. 

 

Luckily for Bunny, he wobbled into another nearby cabinet door where the top of the box got slightly wedged against the handle.  This gave him the leverage he needed to forcefully pull himself out of the box and escape the darkness.  The box was immediately taken out to the recycling bin before it could cause any more trauma.

 

Where was I during all of this you ask?  The entire episode only lasted for several minutes.  Yet, it appeared to happen in slow motion while I was witnessing it.  I was coming down the stairs into the kitchen when Benjamin Bunny first encountered the bad box. And, I made it completely into the kitchen as Bunny emerged unscathed from it –except for his damaged pride.

 

Gracie had been watching Bunny’s exploits from high up in her tower bed which is located on top of the kitchen cabinets above the refrigerator.  Her disdainful expression never changed.  And, she retreated into her bed as if to distance herself from this embarrassing behavior when it was over.

 

While cuddling with Bunny later that day, I tried to explain the merits of the philosophy “just because I can doesn’t mean I should”.  I even attempted to model the behavior to my younger daughter’s amusement.  For a few days, I thought progress had been made.

 

Then, Benjamin Bunny encountered ANOTHER box. …..

                                                                           
Until next time, remember...

 

Curiosity killed the cat,

Satisfaction brought it back!

- English Proverb

Cat Hair In My Coffee

 

Yesterday evening, my husband and I sat down to have our post-workday coffee.  As is our normal ritual, I made the coffee, and he carried it over to the couch to ensure that it made it to the intended location.  I sometimes get distracted and put things in odd places only to be discovered at the most inopportune moments. 

 

As I prepared to take the first sip of my favorite beverage, I happened to glance down into the mug.  Floating happily around my coffee was a singular dark cat hair – ackkk! 

 

It wasn’t so much the cat hair that bothered me as it was the question of how it got there.  This particular mug had been washed and placed in a closed cabinet.  It should have been hair free.

 

Fairly disturbed by this new discovery, I began to wonder about several other oddities I had noticed around the kitchen.  For instance, some of my spatulas and plastic cooking spoons have begun to look a little ragged at the ends.  Not being a very experienced cook because my kitchen appliances hate me, I assumed this was the result of swishing around food in hot pans.

 

I decided to take a closer look at these utensils.  The result was a little horrifying.  Upon inspection, I could immediately see that the ragged edges did NOT come from heat exposure but from sharp teeth.  Teeth that also pulled icky things from between little cat claws – BLECK!!!!! 

 

My trash can began to fill up quickly as I moved about the kitchen in search of anything that looked chewed or scratched.  Yes, Yes – I know that I am supposed to keep my cats from counter surfing.  And, I do try when I am home and awake.  But, somebody forgot to inform my cats.  Apparently, the concept of NO COUNTER SURFING is NOT an innate behavior.

 

I knew that I would have to figure out a better way to discourage my cats from counter surfing in the future.  But, I still couldn’t figure out how a cat hair got in a mug tucked safely away in a cabinet.

 

Several days later, the mystery was solved.  The first floor of my house is basically one open area containing the kitchen, family room, and dining room.  You can see what is going on in all three places from any one area.

 

This particular afternoon I had fallen asleep on the couch in the family room while reading.  I was awakened by a banging noise in the kitchen.  I sat up quickly and was surprised to find Ben trying to open the mug cabinet door. 

 

The handles on this door look like two-thirds of the letter H.  They are vertical with the – part of the H attached to the door itself.  Ben was standing upright on his back paws, bracing himself against the adjacent door with his left paw, and hooking his right paw around the top portion of the vertical handle. 

 

He would then pull back with his right paw moving the door away from the cabinet a little at a time.  After several tries, he was able to move the cabinet door far enough away to stick his head in the cabinet.  The rest, as they say, is history.

 

I was in shock.  A myriad of thoughts went zooming through my head.  What had he stepped on in the cabinets?   Where had his feet been prior to stepping on things?  What else can he open?  OMG – I have a real “cat” burglar!  I can’t believe that I have to go buy child cabinet locks when my youngest child is 19! 

 

But, I must admit I was also a little proud of my ingenious cat.  What a great problem solver!

 

He knew what his goal was.  He studied the problem.  He observed how others accomplished his goal.  He devised a plan and put it into action. 

 

Oh, how impressed my former STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, & Math) students would have been!!!  Once again, Ben is a great role model for both engineers and scientists alike.

 

In order to PREVENT future kitchen maladies, I AM purchasing child safety cabinet locks.  Hopefully, they won’t try to keep me out of the cabinets too.  I tend to get a little impatient with those types of gadgets and remove them with scissors, etc… when they malfunction. 

 

I have also located counter mats that are supposed to discourage cats from counter surfing  (X-Mats).  It would be typical for my two darlings to enjoy walking on them or using them as grooming devices.  I will let you know how they work out.

 

If you have any suggestions to add on how to discourage counter surfacing or cabinet curiosity, please feel free to share them via comments.

 

I would like to add that Ben is equally adept at opening sliding closet and bathroom doors.  Although, he recently had an unfortunate encounter with a masking tape style lint roller while roaming around my walk-in closet. 

 

Evidently, it had fallen off a shelf and landed on the floor of the closet.  Of course, Ben felt obliged to investigate this interesting object from top to bottom.  I assume he got too close at some point.  When he emerged from the closet, it decided to “stick” around and accompany him down to the kitchen. 

 

It took several minutes to separate the two of them.  Hopefully, that experience will “stick” with Bunny and teach him to “look at - but not touch” the unknown.  

 

Until next time, remember…

 

No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch.
- Leo Dworken